IT'S A REAL POO-DUNNIT!
We’ve all been there. It’s late at night and you’re hungry so you sneak to the fridge for a cheese triangle or that bit of choc you’ve hidden behind the milk and there’s a big poo on the shelf.
No? Just Auntie Eileen then.
She was a guest on the Jeremy Kyle show which went viral after she accused her sister Mary and nieces Theresa and Cathleen of leaving the stinky surprise in her fridge.
Viewers, along with Jeremy and the audience couldn’t believe their ears and the show went viral.
In today's episode, Auntie Eileen stayed at home, perhaps to give her fridge another deep clean but her three suspects returned to give evidence.
Fortunately it wasn’t in the form of faecal samples, Gillian Mckeith style.
No, they took lie detector tests, which sadly we weren’t allowed to watch. Imagine the questions.
What is your name? Mary. What is the colour of grass? Green. Did you poo in Eileen’s fridge?
Well all three looked visibly relieved when the results proved none of them were guilty in this particularly bizarre poo-dunnit.
Auntie Eileen will owe the blushing (we assume they were blushing underneath the orange) ladies an apology after humiliating them on daytime tele.
Asked why they decided to go back on the show following the disgusting smear, Cathleen said: "I am so embarrassed.
"But I've come here today just to clear my name. It's disgusting and pathetic what [my aunt] did."
Theresa agreed that it was necessary to wipe away the allegations in public, adding; "I'd rather be dead than poo in someone's fridge!"
An interesting existential take on the matter: die or poo in a fridge?
A sticky conundrum indeed.
The more interesting question is this: if they didn’t poo in Auntie Eileen’s fridge, who did? The case continues.